Grief, Breakups and Bereavement 

Grief is the gateway to love; love for self, love for a person, an experience. It is an embodied experience that cannot be escaped. It can only be felt, given voice to and processed. Grief can be wild, unstable, full of tantrums and tears. But grief can also be a very stable teacher and creator, giving rise to art, music or wisdom. That usually comes in the latter stages of processing grief and will create stables spaces for more love to enter our lives.

 

The truth is that grief can become three things. Anger, resentment or peace. When we are not able to see the purpose of a loss, we fall into anger. When we are unable to forgive the cause of the grief we fall into resentment. If we are able to see all experiences are created by our souls in partnership with the Divine, grief can eventually become peace. When we can achieve that level of peace, our heartbreak ceases and the heart becomes more open to love. Tragic losses can become a foundation for true self love. The question is can you love yourself and your feelings so deeply and unconditionally that new love enters your life at the frequency of unconditional love for you?

 

Loss of partnership and marriage can have profound effects on the mind, the heart, the energy field and our tantric and creative flows. Endings of committed soul partnerships are the hardest to get over because it is not just a human relationship, it is a multidimensional connection of flow states between one soul and another. They are difficult to disentangle because the human relationship can fail in the presence of immense soul love, which one or both parties can still feel. You are essentially loosing three people- one is who you were, the second is your partner and the third is who you would have been with the same partner. It is a profound loss of past, present and future aspects of you.

 

Ideally, a ceremony between both parties to close off their connection can be facilitated, with respect to the commitment of both souls to the work they have put in to be together and traumas they have navigated together. Consciously closing off future stories weaved together allows both humans to leave with their creative energy recalled to them as they go their separate ways. There can be a peaceful finality and mutual respect and gratitude for the ending. When that occurs, the positive karma generated in the relationship creates a smooth and harmonious transition to new relationships or other opportunities.

 

A process called karmic restructuring offers a realignment of the body, mind, spirit and sexual energy towards the next karmic partner heading their way. It can produce profound states of new ecstasy and emotionality and if both of the old partners can witness this in each other, both can leave the partnership in growing bliss rather than the traditional states of loss and grief.

 

Sometimes one party moves on unexpectedly and the grief and trauma that rises up can be tremendous. Having experienced this personally, this offering is close to my heart. A solo ceremony to traverse the inner landscape that can be decimated by sudden loss. A moment to experiences grief with total support, finding the pieces of ones spirit that need to be called back, returning energy that does not belong to them. These are powerful opportunities for inner growth, inner peace and reflection on what the soul wants to invite into their next partnership.

“I honour the love, the dreams, the losses, and the lessons.

I honour the version of me who once believed in this story.

I offer deep gratitude for what was true, for what unfolded, and for all that shaped me.

I stand a new vessel ready for what awaits me."

 

Bereavement presents a similar devastation, except with permanent physical consequences. The difference in bereavement is that though the body dies, the spirit of the soul lives on. Often they stay in the spirit realm as a guide, teacher or companion. These ceremonies are a chance to rejoice the life shared, process the grief of loss of the physical presence and connect in spirit with the deceased and find their intensions on staying with the individual. People report having profound relationships with departed loved ones, sometimes transcending well into future relationships. Even pets can stay on as guides and companions after passing.